CarlWinslow.com Presents

The Top Ten Cheese Pizza Kids of All Time
a carlcom production

10. The Deano's of Fredrick County. These are really just cheese pizza trainee's. They haven't yet become actual 'kids', since that would by definition allow them some basic rights in the category of "mattering" and/or "having feelings", which they obviously don't have.

4. Iron Meden.  Whether he fits into the "kid" category is still under review, but judging from his this sign, apparently he qualifies. Whatever the result of those findings, he's a cheese pizza lover of the highest caliber. Not coincidentally he's a vegetarian who eats soy & veggie burgers that look like big M & M cookies, but taste like a soy & veggies. More on that later.

1. Macaulay Culkin, AKA Kevin McAllister. What can be said. Well, actually quite a bit can be said. His video games suck. How's that for starters? Every played Home Alone 2 for the Nintendo? Yea well, definitely rent that game cause it's a winner*. In fact, skip renting it and buy it outright. Might set you back a dollar or two, but it'll be worth the sheer enjoyment of fighting against moving vacuums and briefcases with invisible owners. Plus the kid tried to divorce his parents. Did he ever succeed in that? If you know the answer put it in the guestbook. He is definitely however, the reigning cheese pizza champion of the world. So good job on that Macaulay. Good job indeed.

*Winner is sometimes spelled "Gayest game of all time"

THERE YOU HAVE IT! THE TOP TEN CHEESE PIZZA KIDS OF ALL TIME!

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